Hello! If you landed on this page we are probably working together on the causes that are keeping you awake at night and I asked you to look at my blog, to help you improve your sleep routine.
Or maybe you are looking for a solution for your sleep deprivation and Google directed you here...
Either way, read on!
This article is very much focused on how to review and improve your sleep routine, so I will skip all the parts on how important sleep is and the horrible impact lack of rest has on your daily life and mental health, as probably you already know all of this by now... So let's go straight to what I would like you to put in place:
A good sleep routine in 4 steps
1. Understand your sleep needs and plan your 45minutes wind-down routine
Consider how long you need to sleep to feel rested (usually between 7-9 hours) and what time you want to wake up. Then do your maths, considering a 45minutes of winding down period before bedtime. Example:
If you feel rested with 8 hours sleep and want to wake up at 7am, you are aiming to fall asleep at 11pm - not a minute earlier than that!
Many people fall into the trap of going to sleep early, because they are tired (as they don't sleep properly) but they usually end up waking up in the middle of the night and re-start the vicious cycle!
Your wind-down routine should start by 10.15pm, so to be asleep by 11pm
2. Tire yourself during the day:
YES to regular exercise, in particular in the morning, or even in the evening, if not too strenuous
YES to walks in the sunlight and fresh air
NO-NO to lie-ins in the morning and napping after 3pm
3. Cut down on stimulations:
No caffeine in the afternoon – this includes soft drinks, chocolate, some herbal teas and energy drinks
Reduce alcohol intake as much as you can - alcohol has an initial sedation effect, but it soon rebounds and can lead to early waking
No stimulating activities during the 45minutes winding down, including working, social media, watching programmes or news, gaming and eating. Create a different routine for those 45 minutes, that you practise each night to relax prior to going to bed. Some examples are having a bath, listening to a podcast, reading a book, meditation, etc
Set all your devices to switch automatically to 'night mode' when you start the winding down routine - during this period avoid at any cost the blue screen light, which inhibits the release of melatonin, necessary for a good sleep!
4. Make your bedroom a cool sleeping environment: think about fresh bed linen, lighting, decluttering, relaxing pictures, fresh temperature, silence, nice smells
NOTE. All of the above needs to become a daily routine to make the magic happen!
HOW TO STAY ASLEEP UNTIL MORNING
Now, after you have mastered the above 4 steps, let's tackle the wakings during the night!
I know that some of the following are easier said than done, but try to explore each of them and test if they apply to you.
1. Don't get stressed by your sleeping expectations
This perpetuates your sleep disturbance, as it creates negative associations with going to bed ('bed dread'). Even if you are awake from early hours in the night, you will be able to cope the day after with very little sleep, so don't get worried that you cannot get back to sleep.
Research shows that even after a poor nights sleep, it is better to continue as planned the next day and not cancel activities, as this can set up unhelpful thinking and behaviour that makes sleep problems worse.
2. Physical and mental relaxation techniques
Falling back to sleep doesn’t have to be an effort. If your physical tension or thoughts don't allow you to rest and relax you can try the following techniques:
Progressive Muscle Relaxation - gently squeeze and release your muscles starting from your feet, legs, buttocks and moving up the body. Enjoy the feeling of relaxation sweeping through your body. Continue to breathe slowly and evenly.
Diaphragmatic Breathing - place one hand on your chest and the other over your stomach. You want your stomach to move as you breathe, but not your chest. Take a slow, regular breath in and check that only the hand on your stomach moves. Breathe out att the air from the diaphragm. Carry on until fully relaxed
Visualisation - this exercise is meant to focus the mind and relax. Choose in your mind an ideal spot to relax (real or imaginary). Somewhere you feel restful, calm, safe and happy. Imagine it in as much detail as you can and see yourself comfortably enjoying this place. Take a slow, regular breath in through your nose
If none of the above work - get out of the bed for a while and do something extremely boring for 20 minutes. Cleaning the floor, sorting the washing, tidy up. When you feel your eyelids heavy again, then you can go back to bed.
If you need, we can practice some guided relaxation techniques in our counselling sessions and you can also google some examples online. Also, I would recommend to listen to the relaxation audios on the McMaster website.
3. Manage your anxiety during the day
Taking action - when you feel anxious ask yourself, "can I do anything about this?". If the answer is yes, just take the action. This is the most effective way to kill your anxiety
Planning - if you cannot take action immediately, plan for it. To Do lists, Bullet Planners, reminders on the phone are very effective in acknowledging our anxiety and promise we are going to deal with it, but not right now
Journaling - as a stress management tool. What works for me is to write my worry, in the most negative and pessimistic way. And then set a reminder to review my worry in a week time (or a different more appropriate time). Usually I feel less stressed by fully acknowledging my concerns and this allows me to not ruminating on my fears until the planned review
The 5 steps to mental Wellbeing recommended by NHS can also give you some ideas on what can help in your general mental wellbeing
We can discuss other tools and strategies for anxiety management in our weekly online and in person counselling sessions.
If you are not one of my clients and you need more help and support, please get in contact for a free consultation or talk to a professional in your area. Having a safe space where you can offload and learn some cognitive behavioural tools can be extremely beneficial in managing your anxiety and resolve your sleep deprivation.
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